If we return to the basics and remind ourselves of them periodically, then life will become a lot more bearable.  Sit down once a week (or more if need be) and just say, “Geese, this is hard.  Little Baby is hard.  My husband is difficult.  Such and such is not working out.  Money problems are dragging me down.”  Just say whatever is pressing on your mind and acknowledge it.  Just releasing it will give you relief.  If you are religious, say a prayer to God.  Give it to God.  Acknowledgement, acceptance, and releasing it will improve your mood, reduce your stress, and allow you to move on with your daily tasks.

Men are simple creatures.  All my husband wants is a hot dinner when he comes home from work and sex after the babies are asleep.  That’s about it.  He doesn’t really have any other demands.  Women on the other hand are very demanding and complicated.  We are harder to figure out and want a lot more than food and sex.  Men have to work harder to keep their women happy. 

Some women want to think there is more to their man but there isn’t.  Sure, he wants to succeed in life and wants a few toys every now and then.  Women want it all and they want it when they want it and they want it their way.  If men and women understood how each operated and communicated their needs straightforwardly, then perhaps there would be less divorce and disagreements in marriage. 

Women must accept that they cannot have it all.  Do men have it all?  No.  Is life fair?  No.  You are only given a certain amount of time in this world and you don’t know how much that is.  Still, you have to choose what you will do with it.  If you want to make an impact and leave something for when you are gone, what will you choose?

My husband has recently decided to switch employment after ten years of being self-employed.  He now wants to do other things with his life, which I do not fault him for.  After all, you only have one life so you might as well enjoy what you do for a living.  However, we also want to have another baby.  It is very difficult to decide to bring a child into your world when your finances are uncertain.  Yet I know that if you wait to have kids until you have the money, then you never will have kids.  Let’s face it:  kids are expensive and their needs are incessant.  We give them the most we can within our current financial situation without over-indulging them.  I realize that I could spend my days worrying this away and rehashing the problem with my girlfriends.  Instead, I choose to support my husband in this new endeavor and trust that he will take care of our family.  I pray every night that he finds what he is supposed to be doing.  I give the worrying, fear, and anxiety to the Lord to handle because I don’t have the time or the energy to indulge in such emotions.  Life is easier when you no longer try to control the details and let someone else be in charge.

When times are hard, you will need your husband.  Having a baby and raising one is the toughest job on the planet.  The more support you have, the more likely your marriage will succeed.  You and your husband need to be on the same page at all times.  Try to ignore the trivialities.  Moms tend to focus on the joys and triumphs of parenting.  Yet you need to acknowledge the hardships.  You are in for the long haul.  Kids are not like goldfish that are lucky to last a year.  This is a job that you must have for at least 18 years and, more often, for life.  You must keep your relationship with your husband strong at all times or you will just be another grim statistic.

Evil forces work against your marriage.  Men are constantly being bombarded by sexual temptations.  Women are being fed the message that taking care of the family is not good enough.  Society is sending you the message that your life is not good enough no matter how much you achieve or how hard you try.  Are you keeping up with the Jones?  What car are you driving?  What school do your children attend? 

You and your husband need to carve out your own small piece of paradise right where you are.  Stop listening to what the world or society tells you is what you have to do or what you need to own and start listening to your heart and what it is telling you to do.  In this world, you only have to answer to yourself and God.  Listen to His voice and yours and you will not fail.  Make decisions based on integrity, morals, right and wrong, and beliefs.  Start today in believing that you already have all that you need.  You have a husband and a family coming.  If you wake up each morning, thanking God that they are in your lives and living each day cherishing their presence, then you will find true contentment.  Despair, fear, anxiety, and sadness will have no place in your life.  Paradise will be at your door step and all you have to do is embrace it every night as it comes home from a hard day in an unforgiving world.

Everything will work out and is meant to be.  God has a plan for your life that will all fit together.  Even though you do not understand at the time, everything has its place.  Just like wolves were created to hunt deer, the world was created for you.  Faith can play a powerful role as you walk this earth and choose how you will live and what you will do.  It certainly gives meaning and hope to the bad times and praise during the good.  No matter your hardships or personal dilemmas, you will survive and be the better for them.

My husband and I have a deep connection that is indescribable.  We cannot sleep without the other by our side.  It has taken a while and many hardships to reach the point that we are at.  We have been tested enough to know that whatever comes our way, we will get through it no matter what.  There will always be family issues to deal with.  Life is not meant to be always happy and fun.  You need the hardships to appreciate your joys since it is the lows that make the highs possible.  Otherwise, life would always be the same, dull boring thing.  It is how you deal with these issues along with the peaks you climb and the valleys you descend throughout life that will define your marriage.  For me, life would be unbearable without someone to share every detail with, be it good or bad.

Finally, try to remember children are a bonus to your relationship.  They are a product of your love for one another and without that bond between you two, they would not exist.  Your job is to keep that bond strong no matter what and if that bond breaks, then everything else attached will follow.  There will be times when your relationship will be strained and under pressure, sometimes from forces completely out of your control.  This shall be when you need each other the most and must have the foundation in place in order to survive any attack on the welfare of your marriage.